Anonymous
Hello ppl. I am currently on the kratom roller-coaster and I want off. I started taking just to improve my mood and make me happier. And it did the the first couple weeks maybe a month. I had an episode where I was about to run out of quality stuff and the one I ordered was going to leave me without for a day or so. I got my wife to purchase me an unknown brand from local smoke shop. I took 2 doses and thought I was gonna have a psychological breakdown. Hot and cold sweats shaking anxiety thru the roof. Crazy thoughts. I said to myself that’s it I’m done when other stuff comes in mail it’s gone in trash. Well I was wrong. I waited day after day with the worse withdrawal symptoms. Had me feeling scared to drink alot of water for fear of drowning feeling. Had me sleeping on couch because I felt claustrophobic in my bedroom. Just having crazy thoughts that I’ve never had in my life.after 3rd or 4th day and the symptoms not subsiding I decided to take the stuff that just came in the mail. Symptoms almost immediately went away. So, I was stuck but functioning. And so, I continued, and things weren’t horrible but not the best either. But then ide start getting anxiety Minnie episodes.
I’d get up to pee and notice my throat dry so than I kept swallowing and became paranoid my throat was going to close so than I couldn’t fall back to sleep. Took a dose of kra and a anxiety pill and was able to fall asleep on couch. So on and of anxiety. Some days I would try to lower my dose and would get paranoid and anxious thoughts and so would take more . I do hv a history with depression and anxiety but h. Not felt bad as far as anxiety for years. I just spoke to my wife and had her make me Dr appointment with my gp. I don’t know what’s going to happen. I thought maybe tapering of was the answer but as soon as that anxiety hits I do anything to try and stop it. Physical sickness scares me way less than mental sickness. I probably take anywhere from 12 to 20 grams a day.
I am hoping some how with a Dr help we can taper down and some how keep the anxiety in check bc I can’t function under intense anxiety. I have busparone that I can take but it seems hit or miss with keeping down anxiety and that with still taking k. I sweat when intense anxiety hits I feel like skin crawling.
-anonymous